The World According To Garrett

melodyrose-oliver: holly—fitch: Aw, Mel, I thought you were my little party protegé, what...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 21:40:15 -0400

holly—fitch:

Aw, Mel, I thought you were my little party protegé, what happened? Was I too mean to little Gare Bare? It’s sad really, how you stand up for him when he can’t seem to mind his own business. Kind of like how you’re doing the same right now. Must run in your family, eh?

Sorry sweetie, I just won’t take anyone picking on my brother, so you just took the wrong side. Maybe you should pick on someone who hasn’t has a raging crush on Murphy for as long as you’ve been fapping off to the man. Guess you two must have that in common.

Oi, whose side are you on?! And I do not have a raging crush on fucking Murphy!

holly—fitch: garrett-oliver: scoffs With that bow? You’re lucky if you look my age. Ergo,...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 20:42:42 -0400

holly—fitch:

garrett-oliver:

*scoffs* With that bow? You’re lucky if you look my age. Ergo, pedo.

Oh, Gare Bare, you need to get over your little crush on your headmaster. You’re trying so hard to make us look bad, it’s pathetic, really.

Bitch please. I’m just having the time of my life having something this massive to hold over Saint Murphy’s head. Besides, I have Blake, remember? ~~Not jealous. Not even in the slightest. Nope, not a fucking bit. Not me.~~

holly—fitch: garrett-oliver: Careful Professor, your inner pedo is showing. I’m 19,...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 20:31:47 -0400

holly—fitch:

garrett-oliver:

Careful Professor, your inner pedo is showing.

I’m 19, Garrett. That doesn’t even make sense.

*scoffs* With that bow? You’re lucky if you look my age. Ergo, pedo.

notthedoctor-profmurphy: holly—fitch: France<3 now isn’t...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 20:16:41 -0400

notthedoctor-profmurphy:

holly—fitch:

France<3

now isn’t that tasty.

Careful Professor, your inner pedo is showing.

pilton: Hot For Teacher - Van Halen snickers

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 20:15:01 -0400

pilton:

Hot For Teacher - Van Halen

~~*snickers*~~

notthedoctor-profmurphy: Remember her? She bloody hated me, I was a regular trouble maker back...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 20:08:48 -0400

notthedoctor-profmurphy:

Remember her? She bloody hated me, I was a regular trouble maker back then. All black leather and motor bikes.

Kinky.

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 22:15:23 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

“Well have you ever tried being with a girl?” Jesse asks. He never understood the whole homosexuality thing, which was why he usually stayed away from that side of the family. He still cared about Garrett, even with all this. “Look, I don’t know exactly what it is that I think alright, I just - well, I don’t really understand people like you.”

Well have you ever tried being with a girl? That just steps on Garrett’s rawest nerve. “Yeah, I have actually. Though, for the record, it wasn’t because I wanted to. I’ve run into the bad luck of having girls and guys deciding they want something from me without even asking. First time, this girl,” meaning Melody but Garrett won’t out her, “was in love with me. We made out when we were both majorly drunk. Realizing what happened the morning after made my skin crawl, even though she’s someone I care about. And the other girl? Well newsflash. It was Ellie. Mind you, after you two broke up. But she kissed me and wanted to offer me a pity fuck after my breakup with Atticus. I didn’t take it because I’m not into girls. So, did I try enough or should I actually fuck a girl sober just so you can believe I tried everything in my power to will myself straighter?”

Garrett is pretty worked up at this point, so he figures why not go all out if his brother’s so disgusted about his sexuality. “I like boys. I want to have sex with boys. I like their strong chests, their hard nipples, their firm arses, their smouldering eyes. I like cocks and bollocks. And if that offends you,” he pauses, taking a shuddering breath, “then you don’t want anything to do with me.” He finishes, looking every bit like a kicked puppy.

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 21:49:57 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

Well I don’t need to see you wank off to Ellie either, especially if she’s dressed up as a dominatrix or whatever the fuck her demented little mind came up with. Jesse sighs, he just didn’t want to have to deal with it. “Seriously Garrett, I’m not the one into guys, it doesn’t turn me on to see one wank off,” he says with a soft sigh.

“Girl don’t turn me on yet I can simultaneously appreciate the fact that Ellie is pretty while being repulsed by her bits,” Garrett retorts. He isn’t liking where this conversation is going. “We’re horny guys with older significant others who can’t make this trip, so we’ll just agree to warn the other when we want some wank time. No big deal.”

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 21:36:15 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

Jesse smiled softly at Garrett, “Well we both know that you got the exact same thing from Blake, just do me a favor, I really don’t need to see you wanking over a guy.” Jesse looked back at him, he wasn’t trying to insult him in the slightest, but sometimes Garrett saw things different ways then he did. There was an easy possibility that Jesse could be being a tad hypocritical, after all, wasn’t he planning on doing the same thing?

Just do me a favor, I really don’t need to see you wanking over a guy. Garrett’s eyebrow twitches in irritation. “Well I don’t need to see you wank off to Ellie either, especially if she’s dressed up as a dominatrix or whatever the fuck her demented little mind came up with. But at the same time, guys have needs,” he says with a bit of an edge to his voice.

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 21:18:03 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

Jesse was on the floor struggling with his bag, as Garrett sat on the bed writing out some form of fictional work in his notebook. Jesse growled as he tried to undo all the belts, damn his mum for doing this, it was times like these that he wished he lived with Dad. Garrett sat up, willing to help Jesse with the bag. “Thanks, man.” He says as Garrett gets it done. Jesse winced as he saw the bag pretty much overflown with clothes. Jesse sighed, “What? You try arguing with a 45-year-old coke head.” Jesse said. Jesse sat on the bed, fingering through the notebook. The door opened, and Paul stood in front. “Guys, dinner.” Jesse sighed as Garrett got up and followed Paul. He smiled as he continued through the bag and finally noticed what Ellie had packed for him.

Garrett bites his lip when Jesse calls Mom a “45 year old coke head.” Yes, there was the whole tattoo incident where she actually did cocaine with him. But he has a hard time reconciling the fact that his mom has a drug problem. Plus, he doesn’t live with her so he doesn’t have to see it every day like Jesse does, which allows Garrett his blissful denial. Paul pops in and tells the boys that dinner’s ready. “Great. With lodgings like this, the food might even be worse than Roundview’s. Or at least on par.” He then notices Jesse’s holding a picture of Ellie. “Ok, I’m going to assume I’m not going to want to see that unless I want to consume bleach afterwards. I told you she’d give you your own special little keepsake.”

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 19:30:09 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

“Excuse me!” Spencer called to some of the guards, trying to figure out their ride. The bus had broken down, and they’d all been stuck taking a truck to their lodging in Caen. Spencer yawned and looked over at Murphy, “Probably didn’t think you’d be doing this last week, yes?” She asked him. Murphy rolled his eyes, “Not exactly.” The truck stopped at an absolute dump of a place. “Fucking hell. This place better be good.” Jackie said, running a hand through her ruined hair, “Garrett and I both need a shower and a decent…” she looked up, looking like she was about to cry when she saw the place, “…hairdryer.” Stephanie groaned as well, “Brilliant, it’s an absolute prison.” Spencer sighed, “It’s about understanding another culture, it’ll be fine.” She said. The translator, a tall thin french man walked over to Spencer. “I am the translator, come.”
“Two to a room, so pair up, people!” Spencer called to the group as they arrived inside. Holly and Cari had wandered off into their own room. Holly was nothing but annoyed with Cari. “They’re gone, Car, I lost the drugs somewhere at home.” Cari stopped and stared at Holly, “WHAT? What the fuck are we going to do here without any drugs? Look at it, we’re staying in a total dump.” Holly sat down on her bed, she wasn’t sure why she was even here.

When they arrived at their shithole lodgings, Garrett and Jackie cringe. They’ll be lucky if they’re going to get indoor plumbing, let alone a decent shower. Then he rolls his eyes at Spencer’s failure in communicating with the translator. At least if Spencer bungles things up, Garrett can communicate with the French-speaking populace. He’s not as good as Blake, but certainly good enough compared to Spencer’s method of loud words and hand gestures.

Garrett tries to sneak off with the girls. Any one of his gal pals would be complimentary to his own admittedly high maintenance personality. Especially when it comes to bemoaning the lack of decent facilities. ”Oliver! Same sex lodgings only!” Garrett rolls his eyes. “Not like I’m going to impregnate anyone. Me cock cruncher, not muff muncher.” Neither of the teachers would back down, though, so Garrett deeply sighs as he follows Jesse to a room. He loves Paul to bits, but he’s not one for cleanliness.

He notices Jesse struggling with his bag, which seems to be held together by 4 or more belts. “What the fuck? How does Mom expect you to open that?” The brothers work together to undo the belt, causing Jesse’s bag to almost implode on itself. Garrett notices a pair of scarily familiar footie pajamas. “Oh shit. Glad Elle’s not here to see this.” Garrett tries not to laugh, but Jesse’s grumpy face makes it hard not to. “I paid Dad off to pack my bag, if only to stop Daddy from trying to pack my matching pair with the teddies on them. And to prevent him from sewing my name into my underwear.”

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 18:32:24 -0400

“Christ.” Alia muttered as they walked the way to the lodging they’d be staying. “Jeez.” Murphy muttered as he walked alongside the other teacher. They had arrived at the airport, and were thoroughly checked by the security members in front of them. Holly groaned, she hated security, this could be a problem. As Holly went through, the dogs began to sniff at her bag, smelling something, but just at that moment both Alia and Jesse had walked through when the beeping alerted the security. They grabbed a hold of both Jesse and Alia, Jesse wasn’t sure why they’d grabbed Alia, probably due to the usual untrustworthy Muslim issues. They pushed them both down a hall. “What the fucking hell?” Jesse asked.

“Do something.” Murphy told Spencer, crossing his arms across his chest. “Yes sir, leave it to me.” John sighed, this couldn’t be good. “Laura, maybe I should…” Ms. Spencer shook her head, “No, I’m trip leader. If anyone’s going to be anally searched, I’ll stop it.” Ms. Spencer walked over to the door and knocked. She talked to one of the guards, explaining that the two being held hostage were no problem whatsoever. She handed the guard some money, and they pushed Alia and Jesse roughly out. Both teens walked out. “Now what?” Jesse said, angrily. “Just walk on.” Murphy said. Alia piped in, “Oh trust me I’m trying they’re just so disappointed when they realize I’m not a terrorist, just wait till my father bloody hears about this.” Cari laughed, “Well you’re sort of a failure of a Muslim, Alia. A total failure.” She said. Jesse and Alia both looked up and glared at Cari.

Garrett winces at his frizzing hair. He needs a shower and some conditioner stat. “Nice one, Spence. We’re staying in a fucking Viking prison.” Everyone got through the airport security just fine until the thing went mental, the alarm blaring as Jesse and Alia tried to go through. A member of security roughly shoves them into a room, probably to be searched in a more…thorough manner. Garrett rallies the cries of injustice, since Jesse is his brother and Alia is a childhood friend of his. “OI! That’s Muslim and Australian discrimination! You’ll be hearing from my lawyer!” he yells, channeling a classic Emily Fitch-Campbell rant. Except not nearly as successfully as she would.

No, I’m trip leader. If anyone’s going to be anally searched, I’ll stop it. Garrett scoffs. “As if anyone would willingly touch your wrinkled arse. If anyone’s going to be anally searched, they’d be more likely to do it to Murphy.” Then the Oliver turns, in a perfect imitation of Blake’s leering face, to the annoyed headmaster. “And in that case, I’d gladly volunteer to do the searching.”

Thankfully Spence has some brain cells left and managed to bribe the guard before his brother and friend got unlawfully molested. Garrett chuckles at Alia cursing at the security person in fluent Russian. Not like he’d understand, since they speak French in Normandy, but it was still a sight to see.

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 17:46:19 -0400

“This isn’t just education guys, it’s total education, so just behave yourselves, all of you. We’ll be working hard, understand the culture of the raid of the Vikings. OK? We get to see the real Normandy. The cultured land that William and Rollo ruled. This is living, breathing history. So you better all be good.” The whole group rolled their eyes, the only good part of this was some time off.

Paul leaned forward towards Garrett and Jesse’s seat. “Hey, Jes. Where’d you hide the drugs, then?” Jesse glanced at Paul, looking confused. “Um. You were bringing them.” Paul shook his head, “No you were going to hide them in your guitar case.” Jesse rolled his eyes, “Paul you moron, that’s the first place they’d check.” Cari grinned, she sat in the seat behind Paul, sitting next to Holly. “Don’t panic, I’ve got a back up plan.” Holly turned and glared at her, she knew that they’d leave it all to her, hiding them in her bag, after all dealing in the past she knew where to keep them.

This isn’t just education guys, it’s total education, so just behave yourselves, all of you. We’ll be working hard, understand the culture of the raid of the Vikings. OK? “Yes, nothing says fun like raping and pillaging. We should probably go out and do it ourselves. Can’t have total education without hands-on experience,” Garrett snarks, grinning like the Chesire cat. Spence makes it too easy sometimes.

Stephanie turns around to glare at Paul. “Glad you weren’t put in charge of the drugs. With ideas like that, we’d be caught in a second.” Izzy, her seatmate, chimes in with her usual dottiness. “Bonkers! Do they have cream puffs in Normandy, or do they eat snails like the French? Ugh, I’d much rather keep one for a pet than eat one. Snails are so cute and slimy.” Then she realizes the others were talking about drugs. “DRUGS?! Can I have so-mmph!” Thankfully Stephanie shuts her mouth before Izzy could finish her sentence and alert Ms. Spencer to their illicit ideas.

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Sat, 25 May 2013 16:59:34 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the seatbelt light is switched off. You are now free to move around the cabin. We’ve reached cruising altitude and are flying over Caen…”

Jesse stretched out in his seat next to Garrett, accidentally hitting Garrett in the face. “Oh, sorry man,” he laughed as he looked down, Garrett was holding a book filled with some pictures, he smirked, they were pictures of Blake. Typical, Blake had sent him some photos to deal with the departure. “You know this is just going to make you hornier, just warn me when you decide to do some mobile shagging.”

Ms. Spencer, their history teacher, a plump strict teacher with her hair pulled back into a tight bun, stood up front. “Everyone, listen closely. Remember this is not a holiday, I don’t want you causing any shit,” she gave Garrett and Jesse the first harsh look, after all Garrett was an Oliver and the mess that had happened back in the old days when Garrett’s father was at Roundview was legend. “This is a chance to nail your module one history coursework, the Norman Expansion, it’s a chance of a lifetime, children. This isn’t just education, it’s a chance of a lifetime.” Jesse laughed, looking over at Garrett, expecting him to make some sort of remark.

The big year 10 trip to Normandy was well underway. Unfortunately, a good chunk of Garrett’s friends were in the year ahead, Blake included. So to give him “something to remember your sexy boyfriend by,” the McClair added some more risque pictures to their shared photo album. Garrett was licking his lips at a particularly hot photo of Blake lounging nude on his bed when Jesse accidentally smacks him in the face. “OW!” Oh, sorry man. Garrett glares at Jesse as he rubs his sore nose. You know this is just going to make you hornier, just warn me when you decide to do some mobile shagging. “Please. Ellie probably sent you along with an even more x-rated memento, knowing her. Same warning applies, don’t particularly want to hear any mobile shags of yours either.”

Ms. Spencer, which Garrett likes to refer to as “Ursula the sea hag” after the character in Little Mermaid, starts her little speech. Remember this is not a holiday, I don’t want you causing any shit, she says while glaring at the half-brothers. Though Garrett isn’t sure if it has to do with Dad’s stunt on their trip to Russia or his own bad reputation. This is a chance to nail your module one history coursework, the Norman Expansion, it’s a chance of a lifetime, children. This isn’t just education, it’s a chance of a lifetime. “Whoopee,” Garrett deadpans with an eyeroll to match.

Photo

Sat, 25 May 2013 16:42:49 -0400

myheartisanapple-maxxie: Hopefully Garrett is keeping out of...

Sat, 25 May 2013 15:51:45 -0400

myheartisanapple-maxxie:

Hopefully Garrett is keeping out of trouble, hard to forget my own History trip.

Oi, why are you singling me out? It’s not like I’m getting laid on this trip. Blake’s a year ahead. And besides, what kind of shenanigans could we possibly get into in bloody Normandy? ~~…though I think Avelina is angling for some kind of party.~~

jesse-mcvon: Me and Garrett sitting by the D Day...

Sat, 25 May 2013 15:22:16 -0400

jesse-mcvon:

Me and Garrett sitting by the D Day Beaches

It’s so awesome here. I’m glad we got somewhere remotely French. Though Mel said Spain was a great place to go.

Sibling Debauchery - @Melody

Tue, 21 May 2013 00:36:20 -0400

Melody was sitting cross-legged on her bed, stroking her bong while Ke$ha played heavily in the background of her bedroom, it was her party music. She’d been hiding her bong along with all of her spliffs under her bed, so daddy wouldn’t be able to find it. She tossed a beer at her brother, as she pulled the bag of weed out of the drawer in her desk. She had a kettle of water sitting next to her, which she poured into the bong, she then up the bowl with the weed. “Alright, it’s all filled up now,” she blew through the top as smoke rose from the top of it. “And that’s how you do it, pretty simple.”

Garrett catches the beer, gladly opening it and taking a drink. Though past experience should tell the idiot that he shouldn’t ever get drunk again considering all the weird shit that seems to happen when he’s wasted, Garrett never seems to learn his lesson. He just wants to unwind from the stress of adjusting to the new family dynamic. He watches Melody demonstrate how her pretty bong works. Garrett takes the device, filling it with the appropriate levels of weed and water. Then he puts his mouth on it, cautiously inhaling. Thankfully his practice with spliffs keeps him from any bouts of amateurish coughing. The Oliver has come a long way from hacking up his lungs in Eli’s garage.

melodyrose-oliver: Mmmm. My babies.

Tue, 21 May 2013 00:06:20 -0400

melodyrose-oliver:

Mmmm. My babies.

Sibling Debauchery - @Melody

Tue, 21 May 2013 00:04:37 -0400

The Oliver siblings were itching to indulge in the usual teenage shenanigans. However, thanks to the recent adoption of their cousin James, the straightlaced JJ was on an anti-drug and partying crusade. They had to be good role models now that there was a new baby in the family, yada yada yada.

So when the dads took James to visit Grandpa Walter, the stir-crazy teens couldn’t help but take advantage of the situation. Garrett listens for the sound of the car leaving the driveway. Then he runs back upstairs and enters Melody’s overbearingly pink bedroom. “The lovebirds have left the nest. Operation Get Stoned is underway!” Garrett is particularly excited to try Melody’s bong, if only because it looks vaguely Whovian. But also because he’s never smoked any way other than spliffs, so he’s curious to have Melody teach him how to use it.

The World According To Garrett

melodyrose-oliver: holly—fitch: Aw, Mel, I thought you were my little party protegé, what...

holly—fitch: garrett-oliver: *scoffs* With that bow? You’re lucky if you look my age. Ergo,...

holly—fitch: garrett-oliver: Careful Professor, your inner pedo is showing. I’m 19,...

notthedoctor-profmurphy: holly—fitch: France<3 now isn’t...

pilton: Hot For Teacher - Van Halen *snickers*

notthedoctor-profmurphy: Remember her? She bloody hated me, I was a regular trouble maker back...

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Normandy is Where We'll Go! - @Garrett

Photo

myheartisanapple-maxxie: Hopefully Garrett is keeping out of...

jesse-mcvon: Me and Garrett sitting by the D Day...

Sibling Debauchery - @Melody

melodyrose-oliver: Mmmm. My babies.

Sibling Debauchery - @Melody

holly—fitch: garrett-oliver: scoffs With that bow? You’re lucky if you look my age. Ergo,...

pilton: Hot For Teacher - Van Halen snickers